The Things We Never Saying

by Elizabeth Strout

I read at least one, maybe more, books by this author and really enjoyed her writing and her insights into people.

However, I did not like this book at all.  I found it very depressing, even upsetting.

The story is about Artie Dam, a high school history teacher.  Artie seems to enjoy teaching and most of his students really like him.  He is very supportive and encouraging to his students.

 As the book opens Artie seems to be depressed and is considering suicide.  We are not sure what has prompted this.  But when he accidentally falls into the water trying to move from a dinghy into his sailboat and almost drowns, his attitude changes.  He wants to live.

Archie is married to a woman who is a psychologist/counsellor.  This is one of my biggest problems with this book, his wife should be sensitive to people and she seems totally unaware that Artie is suffering .  She asks him how school is doing but it doesn't seem that she is really listening.

Archie has a son, Rob, who years before killed his girlfriend in a car accident.  This tragedy has affected all the family.  Archie wishes he was closer to his son.

As the book moves on Archie provides some encouragement to several students which ultimately change their lives positively.  However, times are changing.  He is told he has to assign kids Confederate soldiers as well as Union soldiers in their research projects.  One of his students is rude to him and Archie blows up and kicks him out of class.  He is then summoned to the principal's office and told he has to apologize to the kid.  He does and the kid gives a non-apology.

While this is all happening Trump has been re-elected.  Most people Archie know are dismayed but not the kid he kicked out of class.  That is probably why Archie over-reacted with him.

As time goes by Archie and his son are in contact more and then one day his son meets with him to show him a letter he got from a man Archie thought was a family friend.  The man insists he is Robs father and provides DNA evidence.  Archie and Rob are shocked that Archies' wife/Rob's mother never told them the truth.  They can't decide if they should confront her but never do.

Near the end of the book Archie has an episode in class, he is frozen and unresponsive.  He retires and is not really interested in anything, even sailing.  Still his wife doens't seem to be of any help.  One day she finds him dead in bed, having had a heart attack.  

At his funeral some of his students approach Rob and say how much his father meant to them.  One of the kids asked if Archie committed suicide.  Rob is able to assure him that he didn't.

As Archie's wife is cleaning out his papers she finds the letter that her lover sent to her son claiming to be the boys father.

More happens with the son and his wife and their separation and later reconciliation.  That is about the only good news in the book.

I found this book a downer, with the sad fate of Archie, the fear of trump infusing the book and his useless wife.  The only one Archie was truly open with and truthful to was his son, and vice versa.