The Woman Upstairs

by Claire Messud

This book has received very positive reviews.  It was an interesting book about a very crazy woman.  I didn't know whether to feel sorry for her or want to "shake her" and say get real!

"Nora Eldrdige, an elementary school teacher, long ago compromised her dream to be a successful artist, mother and lover.  She has instead become the 'wonan upstairs' a reliable friend and neighbour always on the fringe of others' achievements" (from the dust jacket).

The book opens with a Christmas memory where Norah's mother tells her there won't be any Christmas presents because her husband hasn't given her enough household money to allow for presents.  Her mother, a housewife, at times, takes off on strange craft projects etc.  She seems a profoundly unhappy person and eventually dies of ALS.  Only once does she protest against this fate.

Norah sacrifices her dream of being an artist when her parents urge her to be more practical.  She spent a number of years looking after her mother as she dies of ALS. She becomes a teacher and occasionally visits her aged father in a senior's residence.  She visits him from obligation not from love.  Norah feels that her mother feels that her life was out of her control  Norah's father feels that the mother controlled them all.  Norah is very dissatisfied with her life.  She expected by now to be a successful wife and mother and perhaps artist (princess myth?)

A young boy, Reza, arrives in her class from Lebanon via Paris.  Norah really likes him and stands up for him when he is bullied by other students.  Norah meets the boy's mother, Sirena.  She is on the verge of being a world recognized artist.  Sirena invites Nora to share a studio space with her.  Norah is elated to have the opportunity to pursue her artistic dream again.  As the two of them work in the space Norah does a lot to help Sirena's large "Wonderland" installation.  In the meantime Norah is working on some miniature rooms of famous women.  Sirena, is a big thinker, dramatic, shocking.  Norah, who feels invisible, unrecognized, is working on tiny, busywork miniatures of unhappy women.  As part of her dioramas her only "creative" or personal part is a tiny gold "joy" she "hides" in the dioramas.  These dioramas, the hiding of this unique joy just confirms,  I think, her feelings of insignifigance.  While Norah is working on these tiny rooms representing the famous but sad women, Sirena is doing a big, boisterous art installation which will include huge fabric screen images of women from youth to old age.  Much more vibrant, in your face and bold than anything Norah is doing.

Sirena eventually asks Norah to babysit Reza.  This is something a teacher would/should never do but she agrees to do so because she is so enamoured with them. She meets the father and is attracted to him also.  He recognizes that she is an "insatiable hungry wolf" and encourages her to free him from his cage. She is truly wacko about these people, daydreaming about them, replaying interactions with them over and over.  She assumes she is as important to them as they are to her.   She seems to imagine she is the boy's psuedo mother. But she is wrong.

When Sirena is finishing her project she doesn't tell or invite Norah to be part of the film portion.  Eventually the family moves back to France and they don't contact her.  She occasionally emails them.  However, she is always followng their accomplishments via the web.  The father visits Boston at one point and doesn't contact her, she is sad about this, but seems to accept it.

"I felt as though in any given instant, anything might happen, all wonder and all possibility... I felt brilliantly alive. And I thought, somehow, still, that she -- that they-- had given that to me.  I couldn't be angry, not wholly angry, at someone or something that could fill me with such joy in life. You're bound to love such a gift, and its giver."

The family's and especially Sirena's friendship seemed to help ignite Norah's joy in life and her desire to be an artist.  However, her total preoccupation with them is way over the top.

Eventually she takes a year sabbatical and as part of her travel plans visits the family in Paris.  They are friendly but not warm.  Reza seems little interested in her.

While she is in Paris Norah goes to a gallery to see the film portion of Sirena's Wonderland project.  She is shocked to see that Sirena has included a video of her masturbating in the studio at a point where she seemed on the verge of breaking out of her shell. She feels and has been betrayed by this person she thought was her friend. Throughout the book Norah talks about her rage and anger at her life. But she seems to wallow in the role of the "woman upstairs".  When Norah sees this video she is "sick" and furious. 

"I'm angry enough, at last, to stop being afraid of life, and angry enough-- finally, God willing, with my mother's anger also on my shoulders , a great boil of rage like the sun's fire in me -- before I die to fucking well live.
Just watch me."

She may have been used and abused by the family, she will likely never have her dream of being a mother (she is now over 40) but maybe the anger and shock are what she needs to break her out of her shell and daydreaming.  She has to let go of the blame she has towards her parents and take responsibility for her life.  There is still time for change/rebirth.

A fascinating story.